I wish I were kidding.

I just said, "I'll have to ask my dad if kids really wanted a Red Ryder for Christmas tomorrow."

Bill disappeared downstairs and brought this back up, no shit:

I was floored. I never knew we had one*. Apparently, all boys had one growing up.

So that's what I get for being a girl.

* What do you think I can get for it on eBay?