Me! July 22! Boo's 5th birthday! To have my blocked fallopian tube repaired or removed!
Yeah, sucks bad, doesn't it.
It's laproscopic, so I'll only be off my feet for about four days, but I plan to:
1) milk it for all it's worth
2) save up a bunch of Maurys so I can find out who my baby daddy is
3) blow my low-carb diet and order a whole barbecue chicken and bacon 'za from Papa John's for lunch. (What a rebel I am.)
We're going to have Boo's birthday party (she wants a Hawaii theme. WTF?) the weekend before so it'll be knocked out of the water before I'm knocked under.
Tuesday, June 17, 2008
Monday, June 16, 2008
Friday, June 13, 2008
Why You Don't Need Drugs.
This, from my bud Ox, about whether or not he'll be chatting online* tonight with my Disney group, even though he just bombed his house for fleas:
"I'll try but I came into the house to find a lingering fog of Bengal flea bomb hanging throughout the house. I have two unicorns having sex in the den and some gray foxes drinking the beer I just bought. My stomach is also a little upset and my head is light and also heavy."
OMG, OX, and this whole time I thought martinis would take me to the light. I've been wrong the whole time. I understand now, O Great One of the Mist. I shall go forth and partake of the Bengal...
* "Napoleon, don't be jealous that I've been chatting online with babes all day. Besides, we both know that I'm training to be a cage fighter."
Today...
...has been full o' busy. I went to work (easiest part of my day) and left at noon (we close our office at 12 on Fridays in the summer*). I dropped my car off at the Hyundai dealership for an oil change and Bill picked me up for lunch. We has some lame sushi at Sakura Blue** and Bill dropped me back off to pick up my car.
After that, I wandered through Big Lots*** where a delightful 12-year-old boy held the door open for both me and a woman with a cart exiting -- I tried to find his mama and tell her she was raising that boy right, but I didn't see them -- and bought a shitload of stuff for 50 bucks.
I then wandered down to Cracker Barrel in search of the retired Webkinz racoon I'd seen there a couple of weeks ago. They were out and I was a bit disappointed, but an industrious employee found one in the back for me. SCORE!
Then it was off to Sam's to see if they had the 6-pk of Chardonnay for $21 that I like, but sadly that deal was short-lived (Prohibition bastards...).
I went to the library and picked up my reserve copy of The House at Riverton, which I don't even remember reserving but apparently I read a review of it somewhere and thought I'd read it. (BTW, Brenda Novak's Trust Me is really good. I'm enjoying the richness of her characters. Damn. I don't usually put that much substance into my posts. Cookie for me for insight.)
Finally ended my rainy afternoon at the bank and at Boo's school, where I picked her up early. I thought she'd be happy to see me, but instead she was pissed that she didn't get to finish her science project (this week's summer camp is Wacky Science Week! And we're all about science! In this house!)
AAAAAAAAAAAnnnd, that's it. Busy afternoon, boring evening. Nothing on TV, so I'm updating my iPod. Good times.
* HA! F*ck off, Courier-Journal.
** Robin Garr, you're wrong. It sucks.
*** Shut up. A bargain is a bargain.
After that, I wandered through Big Lots*** where a delightful 12-year-old boy held the door open for both me and a woman with a cart exiting -- I tried to find his mama and tell her she was raising that boy right, but I didn't see them -- and bought a shitload of stuff for 50 bucks.
I then wandered down to Cracker Barrel in search of the retired Webkinz racoon I'd seen there a couple of weeks ago. They were out and I was a bit disappointed, but an industrious employee found one in the back for me. SCORE!
Then it was off to Sam's to see if they had the 6-pk of Chardonnay for $21 that I like, but sadly that deal was short-lived (Prohibition bastards...).
I went to the library and picked up my reserve copy of The House at Riverton, which I don't even remember reserving but apparently I read a review of it somewhere and thought I'd read it. (BTW, Brenda Novak's Trust Me is really good. I'm enjoying the richness of her characters. Damn. I don't usually put that much substance into my posts. Cookie for me for insight.)
Finally ended my rainy afternoon at the bank and at Boo's school, where I picked her up early. I thought she'd be happy to see me, but instead she was pissed that she didn't get to finish her science project (this week's summer camp is Wacky Science Week! And we're all about science! In this house!)
AAAAAAAAAAAnnnd, that's it. Busy afternoon, boring evening. Nothing on TV, so I'm updating my iPod. Good times.
* HA! F*ck off, Courier-Journal.
** Robin Garr, you're wrong. It sucks.
*** Shut up. A bargain is a bargain.
Wednesday, June 11, 2008
SQUEAL!
"So You Think You Can Dance" Top 20 performing tonight. To bad I've watched every ep every season and I have NO F*CKING CLUE WHO MOST OF THESE DANCERS ARE. Way to go, editors. You've done a great job of selective editing.
You Learn Something New Every Day.
Doodlebug won't eat
OR
but she'll scarf down several pieces of
Well, hell. My dog's a tree hugger.
Fine. Who wants your burnt hamburgers, anyway?
The owners of our building –– who just moved into a pimped out space downstairs complete with flat screen TV and artwork (!!) –– are having an open-house cookout in the parking lot and we're not invited. I hope they choke on that shit.
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